Humphrey – will I ever make my cuppa

So I go downstairs this morning and I’m desperate for a cup of tea to wake myself up.  The first thing I do is almost fall over Humphrey as he lies in wait for me in the living room.  It’s a bit like having insistent children around you with cats who want feeding.

You know, you sort them out first to shut them up then you can get on!  Before I can even put the kettle on he’s weaving around my feet, and his miaow has that pitch that just…

While I’m dumping food into his dish and telling him not to gobble it down, Portia is trying to leap through a locked door by standing on the washing machine and hurling herself at it.  Said door is double glazed so I can see this black shape on tip toes or should that be tip-paws pushing against the door.

Of course there isn’t any fish ready for her so I have to take the chicken out of the microwave where my sister has left it to defrost overnight, make sure it’s somewhere neither cat can reach while my back is turned, and find some fish – new bag so I now have to locate the scissors to open it…

And I still haven’t managed to fill the kettle for the tea.

Fish cooking, Humphrey now desperate to get into the garden, trying to open two doors at once for him to go outside and Portia into the kitchen from the utility room.  Her fish is cooked but too hot to give her so it’s break a piece off, hold it under cold running water until the temperature’s right.

Finally she’s sorted, I pick up the kettle – but no- now Humphrey is back in for seconds.  See to him then… at last at long last I fill the kettle.

Silence reigns for a few minutes while the kettle boils, I prepare my cereal and manage to sit down in the dining room with cereal, tea and the paper.  Peace and quiet until…

Oh no – the choking and retching noise that tells me a cat is about to be sick.  Walk into the kitchen in time to see Humphrey bring up all his breakfast!

But I do love him really.